Up before the crack of dawn. The time was put back an hour and I didn't even realize it until mid morning. Tried to ring Andrew Jones on Skype but he wasn't online. That's the thing about those PC telephone programs your friends have to be online to chat with them. A perv called me this morning on Skpe. I wonder how he got authorization??? I may have to check it out.
Today I'm picking up James' Jeep. I think I have a buyer and that's a blessing. His graduation present was a 2001 VW Passat. I haven't seen it yet. I purchased it on E-bay which was a real leap of faith as I had some anxious moments about the whole thing. But now that the deal is behind me I feel better.

Lately I'm going through some things that really got me down
I can't explain it
Jesus your love
gets me high
Up to the sky
and when I think about your goodness
makes me want to shout
Brother can't you see I got the victory
STOMP
I can't type as quick as they are rapping the words on my PC Windows Media Player but they're happening. I'm in the praise grove. Wish you were with me.
Makes me clap my hands
makes me want to dance
Brother can't you see I got the victory
All my folks say STOMP
everybody say STOMP
JP are you with me
JP are you with me
ha ha ha
uhhhhh
all my cousins say STOMP
my sister say STOMP
the whole STOMP
nothing but the STOMP
STOMP
put some hands together
My daughter turned me on the Kirk Franklin
The album is called GOD'S PROPERTY
It rocks
You got a little taste.
Wish I knew how to put a video clip in here. If you know how to please e-mail me and tell me how. That would be awesome.

Read Magz poetry yesterday on Duo she writes beautifully about the the changes in seasons, Autumn. I reflect my own thoughts on the sights, colors, shapes, smells, and perceptions associated with the season. I actually like fall and spring the best. Why you might ask? I think it's the birth and death syndrome. Now the earth is dying yet waiting in peace for it's rebirth in Spring.
Today I'm off to Charlotte to see "The Producers". I have not seen a Broadway show in years. I used to go with my cousin Ann for our birthdays each year. We'd have so much fun. I reflect on my youth more and more. Sometimes I feel I want to go back. Can you go back? Can you relive the past?

A link you should not be without. Today I got an e-mail from my cousin Ann in NYC saying that a girl was missing her name was Penny Brown, an Amber Alert was issued, instructing us to pray and pass on this e-mail. I no sooner passed it on to all my prayer partners when I received an e-mail from one saying that it was a hoax. Please check this link before you pass on similar e-mails. My prayer partner shared with me "here is a link that you should visit anytime you receive an email such as the one concerning Penny Brown. http://www.truthorfiction.com/ You should always check out stories for yourself before forwarding things. The page that concerns this particular email is: http://www.truthorfiction.com/rumors/p/pennybrown.htm
Yet as I reflect on this e-mail a bit miffed that people have no better things to do in life and on the other hand a sense that God wants us to have sensitive, prayerful, and have compassionate hearts whenever we hear a of a need. What are your thoughts?

I'm back from being away for five days. It actually feels like much longer. Why is that? What a great harvest. I've never seen anything like that. 27 women at a Christian Women's Club meeting in Blufton, SC. Way to go GOD! The Spirit was moving and the audience was ready to receive the message. It was all GOD and prayer. Thank you all my prayer partners. You share in the harvest. Sun City could be a happening place for anyone who wants a ministry.

I'm off to Charleston, SC this morning and I won't be able to blog for at least a week. I'm speaking in Hilton Head with Jan so pray that many souls will be touched by the hand of GOD. I hope we have fun along the way. Went to the library and took out a couple of books on tape for our journey. I'll be speaking at five different clubs in Hilton Head, Blufton, and the surrounding communities. So, if there are any bloggers out there who want to hear my testimony just find out where Christian Women's Clubs are meeting this week and come and introduce yourself. This link will also help you locate a club in your area if you just want to come have a wonderful day out filled with fun, fellowship, and truth. Sending you all lots of love, grace, and peace.

Did I get a deal at Wal-Mart. Way to go Wal-Mart. I'll tell you all about it. I went to get two back tires for my son's car. That's James, 23 soon to be graduating ASU with a business degree. PTL! I have to sell the car and he advised me that the back tires were thread bare. Nevertheless, I went to Wal-Mart to get the same tires I have previously purchased. First the tire man said I only needed one which was great. Then I thought well I'm going to sell it next week, I'll get them both. I'll bless someone. Especially since these tires were on sale for $50.00 a piece $59 with everything installed and ready to go. But then the manager. Tray comes out and looks at my odometer because he was able to bring up my last bill and find out that I only used 19,800 miles on a 50,000 mile tire. I got back close to $30.00 per tire after he did his calculations. This is the first time I ever got anything back. I felt so blessed. I am thrilled. And it was at my Wal-Mart on Hanes Mill Road, in Winston-Salem. Thank you Wal-Mart well done. I told Tray I'll always buy my tires at Wal-Mart and I hope you buy yours there too.

Had a bit of trouble sleeping last night. Besides being up several times for the usual bladder call I still couldn't get settled enough to go back to sleep. My left hip kept telling me it was there. Someone from my church e-mailed me some very cute jokes about getting old. It comes upon all of us. The bits and pieces just don't work as well as they did 25 years ago. Time flies and you wake up and say where did it go?
James arrived late last night about 10:45 p.m. He has a dentist appointment at 8:00 a.m., 5 cavities in one sitting. Better to take care of it in one shot then to drag it out. I'm grateful that he's getting it done and that Dr. Pruette can do it in one sitting. Then I think we're off to get some back tires for his Jeep.
Yesterday I got some information on how to add the more button to continue the paragraph on another page, but I haven't played with it yet. If anyone knows where to put the html in I would appreciate a note. Is it on the template or is it in edit html on the page you're composing? Well not today Josephine. Something for tomorrow.

Up at the crack of dawn. Actually even before the crack. It's 6:01 am right now eastern standard time. I wanted to tell you about Saturday at the county fair when I shared the wordless book with countless children. Child Evangelism Fellowship is a great resource for anyone who would loves children and would like to share the Good News with them. They created the wordless book which is 5 colored pages that represent the Gospel Story. Pretty easy stuff. Seven children came to the LORD on Saturday which is fabulous. Four brothers and three sisters from two different families at two different times. Many others heard and you know some plant seeds and others sow.
I have a car problem. I need to get a car from Birmingham, AL to Winston-Salem and I can't seem to get it together. Please pray for me as I need an extra body to drive down with me or an act of GOD to get it here. If GOD is concerned about the hairs on our head doesn't HE care about our stuff too?

Had to share this Scripture with you. Went upstairs to the loo moments after I posted my last blog and opened a little book on prayer. What do my eyes fix upon but Ps 109:21-22
"Out of the goodness of your love, O LORD, deliever me. For I am poor and needy, and my heart is wounded within me."

WOW I was reading Romans 15:4-6 hope, encouragement, patience and harmony, four words that stuck to my spirit this morning.
You know I prayed with two other people this morning about loneliness, not physical loneliness, but emotional and spiritual loneliness. The more people I pray with the more prevalent and relevant I think the problem is. People want to feel a GOD connection. I want to feel the Holy Spirit in my heart, working in me, present, available, ministering to my neediness. Emotionally, I'd like to be rid of the stuff of the past. Put to bed and put to rest those wounded areas. I am convinced authentic dialog and prayer is the only way. If you can think of any thing else that might be useful, please share it with me.

Remember I told you about the roses I brought at the Farmer's Market last Saturday. Well these are them. If you look closely you can see a picture of James and me in the background. 

Upward and onwards towards my search for truth. Yesterday the prayer for our church missions conference was from Ecc. 4:9-12 Ecclesiastes 4:9 Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: 10 If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! 11 Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? 12 Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
My commentary reads in the Life Application Bible "There are advantages to cooperating with others. Life is designed for companionship, not isolation, for intimacy, not loneliness. Some people prefer isolation, thinking they cannot trust anyone. We are not here on earth to serve ourselves, however, but to serve GOD and others. Don't isolate yourself and try to go it alone, Seek companions, be a team member."
That intimacy part touched my spirit. You know I was talking about feeling alone. I think the aloneness that I feel has been emotional and spiritual loneliness. So, therefore there has to be a spiritual answer. All spiritual answers come from our Heavenly Father who gives wisdom abundantly to all that ask. So, I'm not only asking for that wisdom for myself but for everyone who wants to join me in this journey. May GOD hear our prayers and answer them quickly.
Can there be any better intimacy between people than in and through prayer?

You know I really didn't know what the defination of estrangement was. I don't even think I spelled it right. So, for your sake and mine here is the definative definition.

Main Entry: es·trange Pronunciation: is-'trAnjFunction: transitive verbInflected Form(s): es·tranged; es·trang·ingEtymology: Middle English, from Middle French estranger, from Medieval Latin extraneare, from Latin extraneus strange -- more at STRANGE1 : to remove from customary environment or associations2 : to arouse especially mutual enmity or indifference in where there had formerly been love, affection, or friendliness : ALIENATE- es·trange·ment /-'trAnj-m&nt/ noun- es·trang·er nounsynonyms ESTRANGE, ALIENATE, DISAFFECT mean to cause one to break a bond of affection or loyalty. ESTRANGE implies the development of indifference or hostility with consequent separation or divorcement . ALIENATE may or may not suggest separation but always implies loss of affection or interest . DISAFFECT refers especially to those from whom loyalty is expected and stresses the effects (as rebellion or discontent) of alienation without actual separation .

Right after blogging I went to MSN Zone Games, I love to play bridge. I've met so many interesting people from all over the world playing bridge on the Zone. I'm in competitive novice room 1 usually if you can find me. Or maybe I'll find you. Look for some joy (hint to my nickname).
Nevertheless, I was playing with my friend who is a psychologist and I told him about my blog. I asked from a secular point of view what were his thoughts on loneliness and he shared that the root cause may be from past and/or present feelings of isolation, alienation, estrangement, and abandonment. We had a dialog about trust and grief as well. It's interesting where these feelings come from and what to do with them once they have surfaced in the present.
My quest is how to uproot them in my spirit today and be an overcomer for tomorrow. I'm on the missions committee for our church and prepared a prayer journal for everyone in the church to pray during the 40 days preceding our missionary conference.
Today's reading was from Ecc 4:9-12 Read it and read a commentary, tell me what you think. Two are better than one, and a cord of three cannot be easily broken. That's it in a nutshell.

Having just finished my morning devotionals I came across a section in Acts that addresses a cure for loneliness and gave me lots of food for thought. I was reding Acts 4:23-37 and studying a commentary which elaborated on the power through united prayer.
"This little flock, uncounted, unrecognized by the world, quietly united for prayer in Jesus' name. It is interesting to note several details in this prayer (inspired by the Holy Spirit) of the early church during persecution by which satanic and human opposition were overcome.
First, they prayed to the living, personal God who has all power (4:24) and authority over all flesh.
Secondly, they used the promises and prophecies of Scripture (Ps2) as a basis for prayer in the will of God (Acts 4:25-28).
Thirdly, they made a clear-cut definite request. This was not for protection but for more boldness to witness and more power to help other needy souls. (4:29-30).
Finally, God answered by power (4:31). God manifested His approval of this gathering in answer to prayer by almost a second Pentecost. There was the outward sign of an earthquake. There was a new infilling by the Holy Spirit that resulted in mutual love and intimate fellowship among themselves (4:32); great power to witness (4:33); great grace (4:33); and generous financial giving to God and His people (4:34-37).
Does anything touch you or make sense?

Wow, I think I've had a breakthrough. I was praying with my friend Mary Lewis this morning. God definitely put us together to be sisters in prayer. Over the last ten years we have shared each others burdens. We have become that two cord rope that can not be easily broken. Yet we continue of journey together. I see us as two limping cripples most of the time. Yet together in prayer we make real strides.
Today was a breakthrough because we prayed about something we both battle with and that is loneliness. You can be very busy and with people yet feel alone and disconnected. It's unbelievable the lies that Satan throws at us each and everyday. Mary was saying she feels old, ugly, lonely and is going to die alone.
I invite you to come along with us on our spiritual quest for truth. I suggested to Mary this morning to get a piece of paper and fold it in half. Writing down on one side all the tormenting thoughts that are racing through her brain. Then in the morning we would pray that God would reveal His truth, His promises, His plan, His peace, and His provision for each and every need.
I don't have many of the answers but I did give Mary some insight on two of three problems she was dealing with today.
Being old is not bad. We are all aging. God has great things to say about aging. With aging there is wisdom and honor. In Ps. it says that we will remain vital and green in our old age still producing fruit. I want to be a fruit producer until my last breath.
Feeling ugly now Mary is a beautiful woman. She's fit, smiling most of the time, gregarious, out-going, compassionate, and physically attractive. That ugliness I think is within. Some of the most beautiful women in the world felt ugly. That's a lie straight from the pit of hell. We prayed that God would reveal the areas in her life that make her feel that way and shed light on the truth how beloved she is, how special she is, what qualities she has. Someone once said that after 40 it's the beauty that is on the inside that shows. How can we concentrate on being beautiful inside. What does GOD see as beautiful characteristics. Is it the fruit of the spirit, is it bearing fruit for the kingdom, is it trusting GOD, is it something else???
Back to loneliness. I looked up some Scriptures in the Bible about loneliness. I am praying with Mary that God would reveal the root of my own feelings and how to overcome them at this stage of my life as well as for Mary. It doesn't matter if you're 5 or 55 you can still feel lonely. Does anyone else have any thoughts about that?
Just wanted to share some Scriptures I found on loneliness that might be helpful. Ex 6:10-12, Pr 18:24, 3 John 1:5. I'm also throwing in two Sciptures on God's love because they made me smile 1Jon 4:18, 1 Peter 4:8.

They say stop and smell the roses, so I'm inviting you to do so with me.
I wanted to make myself smile and you too so I posted this picture. It's for all of us. Today I actually went to the Farmer's Market and purchased a bouquet of roses that smelled so fragrantly. I gave them to Jan this morning.

Last night was the worst attack I've ever experienced from the enemy. Confusion, pain, feeling tossed and battered by the waves of indecision, shame, inferiority, insecurity, and much more....
I felt like I took some direct hits. This morning is better. Licking my wounds through prayer, a friend, confession, and grace today has hope again.

Just came back from the gym where I didn't really work out I think I just went through the motions. Sort of coasting along without the sweat. I find it very hard to motivate myself to move especially enough to sweat. Now playing tennis or racquetball that's a different story. I wonder why that is?
Tormented, depressed, unsatisfied but not really knowing why? It's all in my head. How do I rewallpaper the scenery in my brain?

Oh! I forgot to tell you the name of the play. It was The Secret Rapture by David Hare. I'll give you some of the Director's notes so that you'll have an idea of what it was all about.
"Set during the 1980's, a decade now often remembered for its excess and self-indulgence, David Hare's play explores the fate of a character, Isobel, who actively fights for truth and integrity. His attempt at a modern tragedy explores the relationship between greed and goodness. Hares describes his motivation: 'Goodness makes me weep. I see Isobel that way. So, I said 'Why don't I write about goodness?'
In this play about goodness in an era of greed, Hare challenges us to ask some tough questions. Is there a difference between the public self and the private self? Or between the personal and the political? And if we think about our choices and look in the mirror, what do we do when we don't like what we see?"
It reminded me of the era I lived in London. It was a good time in my life.

Joy and contentment I'd like to know how others feel about these states of mind which seems so elusive at times. Listening to the BBC from London this morning. Just found out that Tiger Woods dropped down to 3 place worldwide. Just picking up pieces in the background, not really listening.

It's a wonderful feeling to wake up to a comment. Hip Hip Hurray for the comment givers. That means you!
I'm off to Wake Forest to see a student theater production. I'll have to tell you what it is latter when I have the bulletin in hand. I know it's a drama, that's all I can say now.
Today is my anniversary. Card in hand, flowers in tow, date in front of me. Who knows what else???

Opened my Prodigals book randomly and came to a quote from Charles Spurgeon that touched my spirit and hopefully may touch yours. It read "The first link between my soul and Christ is not my goodness but my badness, not my merit but my misery, not my standing but my failing, not my riches but my need". What truth, what wisdom, what joy that is. Having felt very much in failing mode yesterday it uplifted my spirit today.